Wasting my life one day at a time...

If you happen to see me today then you're a very lucky individual because I got my hair cut last night and look like a stud, but besides that, if you see me, ask to take a look at my hands. After a weekend of stuffing envelopes for my older brother's upcoming wedding, my hands have no less than three paper cuts on them thanks to the stiff, expensive envelopes that my parents paid quite a pretty penny for.

Since he'd already splurged on the envelopes, my dad decided to make homemade labels on our trusty home computer. I immediately questioned the sanity and financial benefit of this move, since our printer is very slow, the label making feature on our computer is less than accurate, the labels were guaranteed to look homemade, and I'm sure we ended up spending more money on ink cartridges than Kinko's would have charged. Either way, the labels are finished and are plastered to more than 700 envelopes and stacked neatly on our kitchen table so they can be stamped and finally mailed. Of course, my dad is freaking out about about having them in the kitchen and won't let anyone eat or drink near the table, because an accidental spill would negate hours of envelope stuffing and even more time printing his precious labels.

Here's some more wedding trivia and proof that my younger brother won't be named a Rhodes Scholar anytime soon. The bride's colors are lavender and grass green, so my mom went on a hunt to find lavender ties for all the men, since the bride and groom decided not to have the males in tuxes. My mom told my younger brother to see if he could find a lavender or light green shirt, so he immediately went to Ross "Dress for Less" to find a cheap one (cheapness must be hereditary). He came home with the disappointing news:

"Mom, I couldn't find a lavender shirt."
"Well did they have anything even close, like purple?"
"Oh, is that what lavender is? I thought it was something the shirt was made out of."

I can only imagine him asking a Ross employee for some lavender shirts, and upon being given several to try on, saying, "No, I don't want cotton or polyester, I need one made of lavender."
To his credit, my younger brother is color blind, but that doesn't explain living 23 years thinking lavender is some type of fabric and not a color. I'm thinking he confused it with linen, the only fabric I can think of with even a vaguely similar sounding name. I guess it's possible to have a shirt made of lavender, since the eponymous color comes from a small flowering plant found throughout the Eastern hemisphere, but I don't think it would be very comfortable, or durable.

Well, that's enough wedding trivia for now. I have some things to do, like finding a grass green shirt for the wedding...made from lawn clippings.